This is just it

I'll hear you
See you together
It'll just be this

I want it and
I don't deserve it

Still today
Do it to me today
Kill me today

Or give me that affection
That laugh
Those kisses
I'm so fucking selfish

I hate being this this this
Animal

I'll die this animal
I breathe as this animal
I'll for sure die as this one

Next:

I'm not him
I'm not a man

I don't have the blue eyes
I don't have the cock

I can barely watch your desperation from here
He barely wants you

Put me to sleep
Today

Jeeze

I'm gonna go to bed

Drink my tonic
I wish I was able to kill myself